tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72140061832080731742024-03-12T23:35:22.329-05:00analog schemesTom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.comBlogger76125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-673616763044908792018-11-08T14:53:00.000-06:002018-11-08T14:53:10.547-06:00IF IT LOOKS BAD THEN IT PROBABLY IS<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">Dear Archbishop George Lucas,</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">It’s time to go.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">To be fair, you are not alone. The Catholic Church is rotting from within, from the top down to the people in the pews. Incremental change is ineffective in a time of crisis. The time for formal listening sessions and public relations blunders has long passed--it’s time to overturn some tables.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">In every published word you have spoken (that I can find) regarding the scandal in which your archdiocese is currently mired, you’ve made it clear that it hasn’t been you who failed--it has been the policies to which you have adhered. Your explanations for future change are a </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">constant, unceasing chorus of self-talk disguised as </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">responsibility </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">where </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">you give </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">voice to </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">your own </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">doubts and failures by nervously negating them in front </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">of your flock--</span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">a constant dilution of </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">your </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">voice, thanking </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">lay people for the generosity of their criticisms, and</span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;"> treating the </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">“thanks” of your </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">parishioners for your listening as a substitute for the gravity of accepting </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">that your very actions placed them in the position to have those criticisms in the first place</span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">.</span></div>
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<span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">Every time a leader uses his voice for</span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;"> that sort of</span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;"> way, the power of </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">his </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">voice is diminished. Eventually, no one hears </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">you </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">at all.</span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;"> </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">Repeating the wor</span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">ds </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">“transparency” and “personal conduct,” </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">over and over as if verbal repetition imbues </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">their virtues </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">instead of </span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">instructing every priest in your archdiocese to torch every modern tradition that led to this lack of accountability is yet another step in the wrong direction. We don’t need transparency. We need men to accept the consequences that come with being men. If you can do that, then transparency will be one of many benefits to follow.</span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">In your letter to the archdiocese regarding your handling of Father Francis Nigli, there was no actionable remorse on your part--only deflecting regret upon being caught. I</span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;">t’s time to move to the second step--you’ve had plenty of chances to blame other people, to show how this was someone else’s fault. Your failure to effectively do so indicates that a resignation is in order, as none of the people who you have suggested were responsible for silently installing a previously accused priest have been fired. There are almost certainly people who should be removed from their positions, yes. <a href="http://edition.4hop.com/CATHOLIC_VOICE/CV_11022018/B76D32979515D55C3682CF6E2381AA7C/CV_11022018.pdf"><span style="color: blue;">But you should join them, especially after leading with the following explanation</span></a> (scroll to page 11 for "A letter from the archbishop on Father Francis Nigli") (gotta be patient, it's a Catholic web site):</span><span style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 10pt; letter-spacing: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">In the assignment of priests in the Archdiocese of Omaha, we have consistently followed the provisions of the Charter for the Protection of Children and Young People and of civil and canon law. There are no priests serving in this archdiocese who have been credibly accused of the abuse of a minor.</span></i><i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Father Nigli, the priest at the center of the latest scandal, wasn’t removed from service due to being accused of abusing a minor--his accusers were 18 and 21 years old. Talking about the lack of minor-abusing priests in response to a case involving two adult adult accusers is like listening to a fat guy who blames his ex-high school girlfriend for his weight gain in his mid-40’s. Abuse of a minor is universally regarded as bad, yes--but abuse of adults is also wrong, and the lack of the former does not lessen the impact of the latter.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">There have been cases of priests who have committed an act of misconduct that is neither the abuse of a minor nor otherwise a crime. In considering whether it is appropriate for such a priest to be given a pastoral assignment, a thorough review is conducted, so that a prudent decision can be made for the good of all.</span></i><i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">When Father Francis Nigli was considered for appointment to St. Wenceslaus parish in 2015, I knew that he was guilty of a significant breach of good conduct with a young adult. This incident had been reported to law enforcement and was not considered a crime. It was not a violation of the Charter. Father Nigli had a good record of pastoral service, beyond this inappropriate conduct with another person.</span></i><i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.3333px;">A lack of policy-violating accusations doesn’t make a valid accusation any less so.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"> If Father Nigli’s actions weren’t a crime or a violation of some random Charter, then why were they not publicized prior his appointment to St. Wenceslaus? It wasn’t until after a second accusation that everyone involved in his appointment seemed to suddenly notice that his Father Nigli's appointment looked bad--a second accusation that, without which, we wouldn’t be having this discussion. Those are bad optics at best.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">The possibility of Father Nigli’s appointment was discussed at length with the Archdiocesan Review Board. This board is made up of lay experts in the fields of law enforcement, child welfare, psychology, education, and medicine, who are not archdiocesan employees. One priest also serves on the board.</span></i><i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">The people on the review board are not good at their jobs if they thought it was a good idea to reinstate a priest without telling anyone in his new parish about his past. Granted, if the Archdiocesan Review Board is anything like most Catholic boards, then their range of solutions was probably limited to the choices provided to them by Archbishop George Lucas. And it's almost certainly not a coincidence that the priest who served on that board--Father Tom Bauwens--serves as the pastor at St. Wenceslaus, where Father Nigli was serving at the time of his second accusation. Father Bauwens had every opportunity to inform his parishioners of Father Nigli’s history--just as Archbishop George Lucas did. But, for whatever reason, he did not do so until a second accusation surfaced. Optics matter. Father Bauwens can join you on your way out.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">Father Nigli had admitted and repented of his offense. He had in place local support systems of laity and clergy. He agreed not to engage in regular ministry with young adults. The pastor was aware of his past and present situation in detail, and he agreed to monitor and mentor Father Nigli. In other words, my decision to assign Father Nigli to St. Wenceslaus parish was not made in isolation.</span></i><i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">Although the decision might not have been made in isolation, its follow-through certainly was. And it’s not the decision to assign Father Nigli itself that was problematic. While Father Nigli was instructed to not engage in ministry with young adults, it was downright negligent that the young adults in his parish were not informed of the reason for the necessity of this arrangement. When you put a sober alcoholic in the presence of drinkers without informing anyone of his struggle, that’s a recipe for failure--not just for the alcoholic, but also for the people invested in his recovery. And, in this case, the people invested in his recovery put many vulnerable people at risk.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">In spite of following established best practices and receiving expert consultation, our system failed. Father Nigli committed another offense against an innocent person. St. Wenceslaus parish was then informed that Father Nigli was removed from ministry for misconduct involving an adult who is not a parishioner. The parish has been hurt. There are understandable questions among many Catholics about the confidence that can be placed in me and in our priests.</span></i><i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">Nope. Appointing a priest without telling his parish of his past should make people question your leadership, but waiting until history repeats itself confirms the validity of their lack of confidence. You should not be trusted--that’s where we are at this point. Questionable credibility is no longer an issue; when his credibility is gone, a self-aware leader knows to follow. It’s time to go.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">During formal listening sessions with laity, in informal conversations, and now after meeting with St. Wenceslaus parishioners, I have heard very clearly a call for a higher standard of ministerial and personal conduct, as well as greater transparency, in the assignment of clergy. In response to this call, we are undertaking a review of present clergy assignments, to ensure that priests and deacons are appropriately placed for the good of our people. I have asked the Vicar for Clergy to work in collaboration with our Priests Council and Archdiocesan Review Board to update a clear code of conduct for clergy and laity serving in roles of ministry and service in the archdiocese.</span></i><i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">That’s a lot of words to say that the guy who led the way into the current crisis is going to spin webs until something changes. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">Nowhere in any of these explanations has their been an indication that things would be any different today if Father Nigli hadn’t been accused a second time. This isn’t a response based on guilt--this is a response to being exposed for the initial mismanagement.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">The scandals facing the archdiocese of Omaha don’t need to be discussed in terms of the priest(s) involved. Their offenses don’t need to be detailed--the legitimacy of their accusers is irrelevant. The focus can and should be put entirely on the head of the archdiocese. The mismanagement of their silent appointments after accusations is the only point that matters here.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0000pt; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">During this time of renewed scandal and diminished trust in Church leadership, we must be diligent in developing even better standards and procedures for the assignment of those who are entrusted with the pastoral care of the people of God. I will make a report to the archdiocese as these improvements are put in place, and I invite your prayers for this effort. Pray, too, that in every way, we may become more clearly the church that the Lord invites us to be.</span></i><i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">McDonald’s has a policy for this kind of stuff: fire people. Fire the accused, fire their manager if they even appear to cover for the accused. Just because we’re talking about God and churchy things doesn’t mean that clear-cut situations are suddenly cloudy and complex: a priest who was removed from his previous appointment without public explanation was silently sent to rehab and then silently appointed at a church whose own pastor was on the advisory board that approved his appointment. And neither that pastor or the archbishop of the diocese thought to tell anyone else of the priest’s history. It may not have been intended to be a cover-up, but that’s the result regardless of intent.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-45476225631785058382018-09-26T15:42:00.000-05:002018-09-26T15:42:50.650-05:00NORFOLK FOREVER? (OR: GET YOUR SH*T TOGETHER AND STOP ACTING LIKE TOMORROW IS GUARANTEED)<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">What if we lived in Norfolk, Nebraska for the rest of our lives? </span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">With no family within four hours, only two other family members in the same state, and two families scattered in every imaginable way and direction, Norfolk has some things going against it. Depressing things.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">Yet Norfolk offers almost everything that many people have said they want in their hometown--it’s small enough to feel safe, big enough to support a family, remote enough that it’s largely populated by people who were born in the area, and slow enough that it will probably be the same town when your kids have kids of their own. Omaha doesn’t check any of those boxes, and Lincoln is full of people who are just taking a break before they move to their mountain homes in Vail.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">On top of that, you don’t have to be delusional to see the hometown values of Norfolk. There are some lesser parts of town, but the whole town isn’t dumpy--this isn’t Columbus. And Norfolk isn’t one of those small towns that’s small in name only--take Papillion, Nebraska for example, which is basically Omaha with a different name (also, hi there, Dickinson!). There aren’t any cities about to annex Norfolk. Norfolk is an island, with an ocean of farms in every direction.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">There are probably a thousand Norfolk’s throughout the United States--not of the same name, no--but this is our Norfolk. We’ve lived here for 12 years. Its pace is lovely--not to mention sane and healthy--when compared to any of the cities where our family members live in Texas or Colorado. Norfolk isn’t a rat race, at least outside of the overachievers at its chamber of commerce. And the seasons--we have all of them. In full.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">Norfolk isn’t going to win anyone on beauty points, but that’s a large part of what will keep Norfolk from turning into anything other than what it is today. There aren’t mountains to draw in a bunch of rich people who view their address as a status symbol. There aren’t oceans to attract hurricanes and tsunamis. Granted, there is the risk of tornadoes, but a tornado doesn’t can’t indiscriminately destroy an area the size of Houston--with a tornado, a house a block away from yours </span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">might get blown apart</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">, and all you’ll be missing are a few shingles.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">Will it be home forever? That remains to be seen, and that’s about the best anyone can guess. We’ve had near-family in Omaha express an interest in having us move there, which does put Omaha on the radar. But Norfolk is where we say we are from at this point; our businesses are based in Norfolk, our son was born here, and Norfolk is where we made our home. And its not a home in the sense that we hung some cute-but-commercially-produced “home” sign over our door--our home tells a story of where we’ve been, how we’ve gotten to where we are today, and reminds us that we’ll always have a place with each other in a world which has no use for anyone who lives outside of the races we seek to avoid. </span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-50051968309540291822018-09-23T15:22:00.000-05:002018-09-23T15:22:53.053-05:00JESUS NEVER HAD TO DIET<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">I</span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">’ve spent the past two years trying to remove things from my life--dieting, selling cars, getting rid of possessions, cutting expenses, and focusing less on loose relationships and more on a small core of friends and family.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">This was partly done out of a self-diagnosed need. In the case of my diet, I was 15 pounds overweight. While that doesn’t sound like a big number, my clothes weren’t fitting comfortably anymore. It was time to either make a change or buy new clothes, and clothing isn’t very high on my list of spending priorities--especially when an ongoing basement project provided more interesting ways to spend money.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">The past two years have also been in response to the struggles I could see in the people around me. I knew people who needed to lose weight, had too many vehicles, homes overstuffed with possessions. These people had grown very comfortable with indulging their vices, and I wanted them to embrace a necessary and beneficial turmoil in order to turn their lives around. In some cases, I had been outspoken and critical with these people, and I wanted to use my response as not only an example--if you want someone else to basically turn their life upside down, you should be willing to accept your own challenge--but also as a means of removing the plank from my own eye. And while the latter reason served only myself and the former reason was expensively explained to be a wasted effort when dealing with adults, I am at least able to enjoy what I would think are the obvious benefits of having a more regulated life.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">Yet, in all of my efforts to remove excess from my life, I did not put any energy towards finding a focus. I withdrew from one side without reaching out on the other. And that is not to say that I haven’t taken steps to expand my life--leading a Discipleship group, embracing the joy that comes (for me) from cooking, and consciously seeking to add partners to my inspection business--I hadn’t actually made any sort of strategic goal(s). Who do I want to be, and how can I use my resources to become that person?</span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">A lack of goals leads to a combination of a lack of well-defined priorities and priorities which are out of order. This has become more and more obvious as the cause of the symptoms I’ve spent two years attempting to treat, as effort in and of itself--even when the effort is effective, such as successfully losing weight--is little more than flailing when you don’t have an established goal. This is like living a life based solely on the action-focused tenets of the ten commandments--yes, it’s good not to murder your neighbor, steal his goat, and get his wife pregnant. Those are pretty universally understood as good things to avoid, yet knowing what not to do is not the same as having a goal and directing resources towards that goal. If you indulge yourself to the point that you spend all day looking at your phone, chasing a sports team, or diving into a selfish and reclusive hobby, these actions can be just as destructive towards becoming the best version of yourself as, say, wasting your life in prison because you killed someone. Lesser evils are still evils.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">I find myself looking to my own understanding of my faith to find who I should be. I’ve gone to church for 36 years now, and when I ask myself “what should a Catholic look like?”, I see a sheep. It’s an image that is used both as an example in gospel readings, and as an insult used by critics of Christianity and Catholicism. So, if not a sheep, then what? When I hear Jesus’ words, I don’t hear a man who wanted to make people into sheep. I hear a man who wanted to make a million copies of himself, and to have those million make a million of themselves. Nature dictates that this isn’t a personality-removing goal, as no two people can become Jesus in the same way. And it’s one of the last dissident things left to do, as there’s nothing so truly contrarian as living a virtuous life in a world where the material rewards are found in selfish action. </span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">That doesn’t answer the resources issue--and holy hell does it leave out a few details--but it does establish a target on the horizon. So let the afflicted be comforted, and the comfortable be afflicted. Let’s find a place where we can share this walk together.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-71291126778256132712017-06-11T21:28:00.001-05:002017-06-11T21:33:19.844-05:00RIGHTS AND THEIR CONSEQUENCES<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">When words lose their power and honesty is not welcome, silence follows. Silence is often not merely appropriate--many times, it is the only honest part of a broken relationship. Broken is broken, regardless of mutual acknowledgment.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri"; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">Logic is useless in a mind which defies, denies, or ignores reality. And honesty is not welcome in a relationship when problematic stories are expected to be believed without question and wrong actions are expected to be allowed without correction.</span><span style="font-family: "calibri"; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri"; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">While it is true that everyone has the right to be wrong, rights have consequences. No one wants a spouse who defends his or her behavior on the basis of “rights.” Having the right to mistreat a love one is about as useful as claiming the right to speed when a police officer is standing next to your car. Rights aren’t the same as being right, and--codependency aside--the consequences aren’t always within the control of the offending party.</span><span style="font-family: "calibri"; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri"; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">When one side of a relationship starts dictating the terms of the conversation because they are tired of having their stories picked apart, that’s cause for honest silence. It doesn’t matter if their stories are full of holes, nor does it matter that a new, equally hole-filled story will take their place once the initial stories meet resistance. What matters is that honesty is barred when faith is expected by those whose constantly-shifting stories confirm the lack of basis for their expectation.</span><span style="font-family: "calibri"; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri"; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';">Silence isn’t the same as giving up; sometimes silence is the only honest part of a relationship. What power do words have when logic is useless and honesty is not welcome?</span><span style="font-family: "calibri"; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-36450456609928031292017-02-27T22:57:00.000-06:002017-02-27T22:57:49.691-06:00DEALING WITH WALLS<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The primary goal of a wall is to avoid moving. Most walls are designed and built with this goal in mind. So, if your goal is to make a wall move, you have to understand that you’re attacking its strength.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Attacking a strength is a good way to lose.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Walls come in many forms: a closed mind. Delusion. Thoughtlessness. Intolerance. On…and on…and on.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You can’t change someone’s mind when it is closed. Honest conversation is impossible when you’re talking to a person who believes their own lies. And logic is useless when you’re dealing with someone who refuses to think for himself.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When you personally try to sway someone who falls into one--or all--of these categories, it’s a losing cause. Every time. It doesn’t matter how close the family member, how wayward the friend, or how motivated you are in your efforts. Intellectually, spiritually, emotionally--you’re going to lose when you go straight at someone whose only goal is to avoid moving.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Hard work truly is a talent, but you can’t out-work someone when they believe they have a consequence-free, regardless-of-wrong option to disagree with you. This is the nature of a wall. They may lash out or shut down; they may be vulgar or silent. In the end, it doesn’t matter: if they don’t move from their position, they win.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So, to reiterate: run into wall. Lose.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Solution time!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The first step to dealing with walls is to recognize them for what they are. The second step is to expose them as walls to anyone who will listen. This is not to say that you should run around saying “so-and-so is a jerk who doesn’t listen.” That will not suffice, as you’ll eventually lose credibility and--therefore--any leverage you may have had in making your case in the first place. You can’t simply proclaim: you have to expose. You can’t merely repeat what a wall tells you--you have to make the wall say it often, loudly, and to as many people as possible. You have to make the wall expose himself as the closed-minded, delusional, unthinking, intolerant person he is.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">At this point, your motives will be questioned, and rightly so. If you are trying to save the wall, then--on the surface--it doesn’t make sense to have the wall publicly torch itself. Or so it seems! Nature is change. And this wall--or walls, when dealing with multiple individuals--is not static. Walls are dynamic, ever-changing beings. They may not respond positively to your vast, enthusiastic logic, as many walls would rather stop talking to you when they are wrong. But very, very few walls are willing to go silent and alienate everyone they know, regardless of how small their circle of friends may be. Absolute loneliness is, for many, a motivational bitch.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Or perhaps your efforts are not focused on the salvation of the wall, as the wall has shown himself to be unmoving regardless of consequence. Cancer comes to mind here. Sometimes you must red-pill everyone in the vicinity of the wall, as cancer will spread whenever it is allowed to do so. Whether passive or aggressive, cancer spreads. In which case, the effort to expose a wall as a wall is in an effort to prevent the wall from spreading its wrongs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Walls can spread their cancer from one generation to another, or in any direction in which they are left unchecked. Those who would seem immune to the effects of a wall due to childhood experience often exhibit symptoms at some point in their life. Whether the matter is political, educational, and spiritual views or verbal, physical, or substance abuse, walls must be exposed as walls.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sometimes the wall can be saved, but--in the end--the wall has to choose salvation. But if the wall refuses to yield, then may the wall’s exposure save as many as possible. Be bold; be strong. Your walls are your own, but you are not alone as long as you can focus all attention on the wall and avoid making it about yourself.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-65959139113984902852017-02-20T21:07:00.001-06:002017-02-20T21:08:08.842-06:00Dear D.L.,<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">…and now we’re more alone than ever.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">There were five people in agreement on what needed to happen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Less than a week later, it was down to four.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And now--six months later--only two people are following through on the actions which five originally agreed upon. Those two people are the problem--everyone else has moved on.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">This was never about the yelling. The yelling was one of the many symptoms of an abuser who refused to take responsibility for his actions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Short and simple: the abuser still hasn’t taken responsibility.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Nothing has changed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Those who have moved on have simply moved on. No one else talks about this situation every night. It’s fixed. It’s over.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Nope.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Truth sounds like hate to those who hate truth. Silence confirms this, and silence says more than an endless stream of delusional explanations ever will.</span><span style="font-family: "calibri"; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: SimSun; mso-spacerun: 'yes';"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-56526710833070338332017-02-20T12:22:00.002-06:002017-02-20T12:38:54.735-06:00Dear D.L.,<div class="MsoNormal">
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<span style="font-family: Arial; letter-spacing: 0pt;">I should have written this before last Friday, but it</span><span style="font-family: Arial; letter-spacing: 0pt;">’s tiring when you’re expected to be the only one who comes up with answers. So a post-weekend prediction--which proved to be true--will have to do.</span><span style="font-family: Arial;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; letter-spacing: 0pt;">You hadn’t visited in almost six months. You didn’t call, write, or give any explanation for your silence. You let your wife--who was all to happy to put on a good front, to tell everyone how much you’ve changed--do all the talking for you. You took the easy way out, thinking that the passing of time would replace the explanation you refused to give.</span><span style="font-family: Arial;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; letter-spacing: 0pt;">Time won’t heal this one. You want to us to come back in the water because you’ve stopped being a hurricane. But you haven’t acknowledged what you’ve done. You haven’t expressed any remorse to anyone, with the exception of the codependent enabler in your life who will always coddle you and tell you how much it wasn't your fault. You’ve just stopped raging (this is second-hand knowledge--please confirm), with the hope that everyone will forget. But how can anyone believe what you refuse to acknowledge?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; letter-spacing: 0pt;">Last September, there were six of us in a room. Five of us all agreed on what had to be done: you had to make visible, outward changes, and that the rest of us couldn’t go back to acting like everything was normal until you did. But you wouldn’t even admit your fault when we gave you specific examples of your abuse. You blamed your victim, you denied your responsibility. You had no idea what was important in your life, you professed to love an occupation that clearly makes you miserable, and you refused to take responsibility for the changes you need to make in your life.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; letter-spacing: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; letter-spacing: 0pt;">You know how this situation came to be. For 46 years, no one has ever held you accountable. Your family, for all of their virtues, cowered in fear of you. When you blew up, no one called you on it. You just expected everyone else to get over it--and if they didn’t, that was their fault. You just moved on, as though it was your place to do so. You'll be lucky if that trait doesn't continue into the next two generations.</span><span style="font-family: Arial;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; letter-spacing: 0pt;">Which brings me back to this past weekend. You want everything to go back to normal because you’ve been behaving--but in three days of visiting, you didn’t even acknowledge the change in your behavior, much less the reason for the change. But I can give you the simple version: an outsider came into your family and showed you a mirror. You--and everyone else in your immediate family--has now seen who you’ve been, who you are, and who you’re going to become if you don’t take responsibility for your life and make dramatic changes as a result. Incremental changes are already obsolete, and your continued silence will only make things worse.</span><span style="font-family: Arial;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; letter-spacing: 0pt;">Things don’t have to get worse. They can get better--you can decide to make changes. This is not as good as it gets. The present situation is not the best we can do. What we (and by "we," I mean the rest of us) are dealing with right now is trying to make the best of a broken family--and fixing broken things is what you do better than anyone I know. </span><a href="http://analogschemes.blogspot.com/2017/02/dear-dl.html"><u><span class="15" style="color: blue; font-family: Arial; letter-spacing: 0pt;">Fix this. Fix it now.</span></u></a><span style="font-family: Arial;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-50688575088690427102017-02-09T22:01:00.002-06:002017-02-09T22:01:59.809-06:00Dear D.L.,<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Why do you miss me? Stop waiting for me to fix this--only you can make a positive difference in our relationship.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Here's a short list of ways:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Go to marriage counseling.</b> You're not going to listen to anyone in this family when they try to help. You can't tell the difference between sorrow and guilt at this point--and without remorse, you're just behaving.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Schedule your own doctor appointments.</b> Don't make someone else do it; take responsibility for your own life.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Cook meals, pay the bills, and do the laundry--basically, <b>if you don't feel like doing a task at your house, that's your cue to do it</b>. Your wife treats you like a toddler because she believes you'll fall apart if she doesn't do literally everything for you. Is she right?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And <b>tell everyone to stop speaking for you.</b> They offer nothing more than excuses anyway.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The truth of the matter is that </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">this could be fixed in short order i</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">f you would put half as much effort into healing our families as you do into finding the best price on fence posts. And i</span><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">f you come back with "I'm going to try harder, and we're going to take it slower," remember this: an alcoholic who drinks less, or slower, or in a more relaxed fashion is still an alcoholic.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">You need to change. Drastic change.</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-16068948925784947262017-02-06T20:22:00.000-06:002017-02-06T20:31:20.736-06:00THE KETO DIET<div class="MsoNormal">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3Zg7e5Cd9p9k7HEoELyA3B0FbcCIUPPdXKVS-95pxn51WTkMvntMEHodZ80tEYoRYL7wGVu97nOWjYpiEIrseFOU11c0DkKno1v0RIlklhjpV_qSeg6SS_CYjwalce7qU1GULk93mET4/s1600/Keto+Mounds.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3Zg7e5Cd9p9k7HEoELyA3B0FbcCIUPPdXKVS-95pxn51WTkMvntMEHodZ80tEYoRYL7wGVu97nOWjYpiEIrseFOU11c0DkKno1v0RIlklhjpV_qSeg6SS_CYjwalce7qU1GULk93mET4/s320/Keto+Mounds.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Keto Mounds!</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">So. The Keto diet. It’s worked for me—I started 2017 at 160
lbs. Yesterday I saw 148.8. I'm not one to take shirtless photos in the mirror, so no picture evidence will be offered without payment. But I'm happy with how I feel, and that's not something I say lightly.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The Keto diet is a variant of what most people know as the
Adkins diet: the famous low/no carb diet. The Keto diet, however, focuses more
on fat and less on protein than the Adkins diet. But the bottom line is pretty
simple: no carbs. No bread, no fruit, no sugar. And while that probably sounds
like a terrible combination—a high-fat diet with no fruits and limited
vegetables—I’ve probably eaten healthier in the last month than I have in
years. I’ve had more salads than ever, and I’ve rediscovered the fact that I
really like brussel sprouts.</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"></span></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I’m not sure if it’s the science of the Keto diet that
works: when you eat carbohydrates, your body converts the carbs to glucose to
use as a relatively immediate energy source. Glucose which is not used for
energy is converted to glycogen and stored in the liver; once this store of
glycogen is full, the excess is stored as fat.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When eating a Keto diet, though, you’re not eating carbs.
After a few days of avoiding carbs, your body runs out of stored glycogen, and
your liver begins to produce something called ketones from fatty acids (fat) in
your body. Your body begins to run on fat rather than glucose and glycogen. So,
rather than burning off mostly glycogen while you go through your day, you’re
burning fat.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">That’s the glossed-over, surely oversimplified version. I
suspect that part of my weight loss has come from a reduction in calories, as
the lack of bread, fruits, ground-growing vegetables, and normal desserts has
reduced my food choices. But I’ve eaten really heavily when I do eat—I do not
feel hungry at all. I have cravings for sweets and things that are non-Keto
friendly, but I haven’t been hungry. I’ve been able to deal with my sweet
cravings by making “fat bombs,” the latest batch being a Keto-friendly copy of
Mounds bars.</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">While we’re on the subject of sweets, though, allow me to
recommend against ever buying 100% dark chocolate. That is just terrible,
terrible stuff. I’ve used it in my Mounds bars, and it works due to the
sweetness of the recipe (which uses erythritol sweetener in place of sugar).
But if you eat it alone, you will hate even the smell of chocolate for weeks.
So go easy on the 100% dark chocoloate.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-82452495430649422642016-11-21T22:47:00.000-06:002016-11-21T22:47:17.926-06:00BABY FATHERHOOD: ABOVE ALL, MAKE IT FAIR<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">New fatherhood is a matter of focus. What matters the most in any marriage? The love of husband and wife. It goes without saying, but when it goes unsaid, it's easy to forget. And that doesn't change when baby #1 arrives. It becomes more important.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The role of a new father is to serve his wife. That's it. You may think "I can't do anything, she has to do all of these things, all I can do is change diapers, etc." Yes--there is truth there. Mother Nature is sexist. Mothers dominate when it comes to breastfeeding, nurturing, and emotionally attaching. Fathers tend to think that they are relegated to support duty in many areas. And while that is true, it's a destructive perspective that leads many husbands to lazily refuse to do all that they are able to do.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You can change diapers. You can get your wife a cup of water with a straw when she is breastfeeding. You can learn different ways of holding your baby so that you can help to calm it when it is upset. You can learn to use the 5 S's of calming a baby for naps and nighttime put-downs: shush, suckle, swaddle, shake (jiggle, for everyone who just rended their garments over the term), and side-turn.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You can take the baby for a walk so that your wife can take a nap.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If your wife uses a breast pump, you can clean all of the pump parts. In fact, you SHOULD clean all of the breast pump parts--pumps may be awesome in terms of the flexibility that they offer to breastfeeding moms, but they are inconvenient, cumbersome, and deserve to be hated by those who must use them on a daily basis. Your wife has to use the pump to fill the bottles--she should never have to clean any of those damn parts. That's like having the same person do the dishes after cooking every meal--it's an unfair arrangement. Be a man, not a male: make it fair.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In fact, that's the point. Your job, as a husband and new father, is to make everything as fair as possible. Don't take a defeatist, self-loathing approach--that's what quitters do. You're a man. Your wife had to carry the kid for 9 months. She's going to be its primary care giver for far longer than that. If she's breastfeeding, she'll be its main source of nutrition for many months. Your job is to take a very unbalance equation and make it as balanced as you possibly can. That's what men were created to do--we were built for impossible situations, righting that which cannot be moved, and overcoming obstacles.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If your wife tells you that you're doing something wrong, don't shrink away and make her do it for the rest of the kid's life. Don't take anything personally. Give without end. Pray. And when you pray, don't ask God to make the baby stop crying, make the baby sleep, or for peace in your house. People pray for miracles; men pray for resolve. Don't ask God to do anything that you can learn to do--the baby will continue to cry if you do nothing but pray about it. If the baby is crying, learn to calm it. If the baby won't sleep, get out of bed and keep trying new things until you find what works. If your house is a dark place for you or your wife, flood it with whatever light is needed to drown the depression.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You are a fist. Mentally, physically, spiritually. Nothing of substance was ever born out of easy times; it is the difficult times that make us who we are. Prepare yourself; rise up, serve, and give selflessly. Do everything that we are told "men don't do." Most men aren't men, and our feminist generation needs men to be men more than ever. This is your chance to be all that you can be, for both this generation and the next.</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-85819887009445514202016-11-09T12:22:00.001-06:002016-11-09T12:22:51.336-06:00BACKLASH<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Trump's victory was a backlash against political correctness. </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The left created Trump's supporters--he literally could not have won without the left. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Accusations of racism, sexism, and a countless number of -ism and phobia labels created Trump's supporters, and every effort to double down only drove more people to join them. The racist wall, his sexist words--his politically incorrect nature attracted people who have for many years been told that they were racist or sexist for holding thoughts that were deemed to be offensive.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Every new accusation from the left alienated more people--even those who considered themselves liberal and left-leaning--as each new accusation held a heightened offense over a smaller and/or more specific grievance. Trump greeted them with open arms by showing them that you can, in fact, say what you believe--and you don't have to give the time of day to those who would rather label you. That's exactly what Trump did.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Cultural appropriation. Misogyny. Islamophobia. Xenophobia. Racism. Sexism. Bigotry. The list of labels kept growing, and the brush used to apply these labels got wider and wider as the election went on--and it eventually got so wide that the very people who applied the labels could not avoid being labeled themselves. Amy Schumer comes to mind, as she was accused of cultural appropriation when she made a parody of a Beyonce song.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">P</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">olitical discourse is dead when you accuse large segments of the population of being racist. And when your side keeps finding new ways to kill discourse, you're going to lose. You're going to lose debates, you're going to lose people, and you're going to lose elections. Third party voters didn't elect Trump--you did.</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-38993373983637966962016-06-14T22:17:00.001-05:002016-06-14T22:27:48.614-05:00DEAR GAYS,<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The left chose Islam over you.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">the </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Supreme Court ruled in favor of same-sex marriage, all of the cool kids on Facebook raced to get that hip rainbow overlay for their profile picture. Your news feed was full of friends* who couldn't wait to remind those homophobic Christians that their hateful marriage amendments had failed.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If you didn't feel like a pawn after that spectacle, then the silence which has followed the killing of 50 gays by a Muslim man should leave you with no doubt.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The left has its religion, and it has nothing to do with your rights. Islam is the religion of the left. </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">You were never anything more than a token that the left wanted to claim to protect from the the group the left wants to shame out of existence: that being, anyone who doesn't abide by its </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">politically correct, privilege checking, greatness eliminating, false-equality enforcing rules. </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The left is full of people who are quick to accuse others of hate, racism, and sexism when they do not abide by the left's rules, and you were only going to benefit from that as long as it didn't infringe on the left's religion.</span><br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Islam is the religion of the left because it deals with gays in the same way that the left tries to deal with anyone who does not abide by its </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">rules.</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Islam does not want a conversation, nor does the left. Islam does not offer compassion to those who do not live by its demands, and neither does the left. </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Depending on who you ask, there are ten or eleven counties where--by law--the penalty for being gay is death.</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> Yet the left chooses Islam over any other religion, and then has the audacity to claim to be advancing gay rights. Despite what the left tells you, it's been a few years since the Pope last called for killing in the name of Jesus.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Even if the left was correct (it's not) in its claim that the Christian response to the gay rights movement was motivated by nothing more than homophobia--that being, an unreasoning fear of homosexuals and homosexuality--hopefully you now know that supposed fear is significantly less harmful than outright hate. </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">After years of the left telling you that you were being persecuted by Christians, a </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Muslim man killed 50 gays in one night. And now the left refuses to call the crime what it is, preferring to treat the man as an outlier rather than a symptom of everyday Muslim culture.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Muslim violence towards gays is nothing new--<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBlwxqqAprQ"><span style="color: blue;">it's just new in America</span></a>. It treats women in much the same way--take note, feminists! What has happened in countries on the other side of the world just made it to our shores. Now that you have seen that those who claimed to defend you will not lift a finger even when they see their alleged persecutions replaced with outright murder, you know that you are just like the rest of us.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The left is too busy trying to</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> <a href="https://genderandsexuality.uic.edu/gender-inclusion-uic/gender-neutral-bathrooms/"><span style="color: blue;">conquer transgender bathrooms</span></a> to be bothered when its primary preferred victim group stops playing nice and decides to wage war on one of its secondary groups. The left is more a danger to your rights than the right wing Christians ever were--stop allowing them to use you, remember who did the killing in Orlando, and conduct yourselves accordingly.</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-46294279694907155632016-06-13T15:18:00.000-05:002016-06-13T16:41:28.133-05:00MUSLIMS? BIGOTRY? NOPE THE PROBLEM IS GUNS<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Where is the social justice outcry against Islam after the shooting at a gay bar in Florida? Facebook is clearly struggling to fill my feed this week</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When <a href="http://www.lgbtqnation.com/2016/06/westboro-baptist-trolls-lgbt-people-orlando-attack/"><span style="color: blue;">Christians from Westboro Baptist Church hold signs</span></a>, it's national news. They are called racists and bigots. They are rightly ostracized and shunned. But no one goes out of their way to make a distinction between Westboro and other Christians. When a Christian does something racist or bigoted or wrong, social media doesn't fill up with stories explaining how that one person is an outlier. When a Catholic priest molests a boy, all Catholic priests are suspects. And Catholics who support priests are deluded deniers. And so on.</span><br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">But when a Muslim kills 50 people at a gay night club, he's an outlier. An anomaly. The fact that he was a Muslim, and that he killed gay people--what a coincidence. </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Islam isn't the issue, and Islamic teachings aren't the issue.</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> The killer's actions do not represent Muslim beliefs regarding gays in any way--he was just committing an act of terror because he was connected to ISIS. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">No, no, no. </span><span style="color: blue; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.cnn.com/2016/06/13/politics/obama-orlando-gun-control-homegrown-extremism/" style="color: blue;"><span style="color: blue;">The real issue is guns</span></a></span><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">. Instead of asking why the silent majority of Muslims are not rising up to condemn a shooting at a gay night club, gun owners everywhere are implicated by a president who has no problem with guns when they protect him but clearly doesn't mind making it harder for everyone else to own them. Islam is the religion of peace. Guns are the religion of violence.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If a guy wearing a red baseball cap had killed 50 people at a gay night club, my Facebook feed would have exploded with stories about how Trump supporters are bigots who hate gays. When a Muslim does it, there's room for stories about how Westboro Baptist Church says that "God sent the shooter" to Florida. A Muslim kills 50 people, yet someone has time to write about a bunch of sign-holders from Kansas, and ISIS is named as the scapegoat? And then it becomes leverage for gun control?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Jesus. That's all I keep thinking. Jesus.</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-8248478549255584662016-06-10T20:47:00.000-05:002017-02-28T13:04:46.425-06:00DEAR D.L.<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">For many people, it's too late to change. It's too late for them to recover. Their body or mind is too far gone to heal itself. You see these people in dialysis or nursing homes for a while, and then they are gone. At some point, your body can no longer heal itself, and your mind can't find its way back.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">You are not one of those people. You have taken steps to get your body back to a self-healing status, and your body has responded. You have highs and lows--and while you don't always seem to know where you are, you do know where you don't want to be. While that doesn't necessarily help you find your destination, it does help you know the areas to avoid. Sometimes that's what success looks like--I know, because much of my success is due to nothing more than simply avoiding disaster.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Your body will recover remarkably as long as you continue to choose what is good.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Your mind will find peace if you spend time in the company of those who have your best interests at heart.</span><br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And the fact of the matter is that there really isn't a third direction. You can go back, or you can go forward. Staying in the same place is the same as going back. Back takes you to a place you know. Forward takes you to a place that you've either long forgotten, or--worse yet--never known. Regardless, you know that you want to get better. You want to keep your blood sugar under control, lose weight, find peace, and love and be loved by those who matter most.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I can see these things. I'm not in a perfect place, but I am moving forward. It is ironic that I say this at a time when I am ten pounds heavier than I have been since college, but it is true--physically speaking, I am doing better than I have in years. And much of that is due to my mental state. I have learned to avoid those things which cause me stress due to my lack of control over them, and I have found alternatives which do not control me. When I first started my business, I was a man on an island. As I have moved from working with stressed individuals to working with professional clients, my stress level has plummeted. I went from feeling like everyone was going to sue me to believing that everything was going to be okay, and that progression continues to this day. It is no coincidence that I am now eating wheat and dairy without a second thought.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">In the process, I have learned to rid myself of many habits. These habits included a vehicle, a few people, and countless personal decisions which I wish I would have given up years ago. I can't turn back time, but I can say without hesitation that clarity of mind with an older body can achieve more than clouded youth ever could. Besides, there will soon come a day when I look back on this day in the same way that I look back on my twenties.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">You can do this, too. I'm not saying you can change--you are you, just as I am me. I can't be you any more than you can be me. But you can repair damage. You can change your habits, and those changes will literally move your mind from chaos to peace. You can walk away from the things that hold you back. You can choose what frees you over that which owns you. You can come in out of the weather and place yourself in the shelter of those who would help you become the best that you can be, rather than dealing with those who will reject even your best.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">There may be a limit to how much you can walk away from many things, habits, and people, but there is no end to the effect that your efforts can have for you. Your demons will always be your demons--any addict can attest to this. An alcoholic can't rid the world of alcohol, but he can wake up every day and act in such a way as to maximize his chances of avoiding alcohol. You can't make your demons disappear, but you can minimize your exposure to them. That is something you must do every day for the rest of your life. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">At the start, it will be impossible. You will wake up and think of nothing but going back to your old ways. But if you seek the company of those who want what is best for you, then you will give yourself a chance. Every day that you spend time with those people is a step away from where you are and a step closer to where you need to be. And this isn't just for you--you are doing this for everyone who loves you. I am one of those people. I would not be who I am today without you. And I don't just want you to be alive--I want you to find peace. I want you to have no pain. I want you to sleep well, breathe well, walk well, and do things that you enjoy. You've spent a lifetime suffering--and if you don't want to spend the rest of your years doing more of the same, it will have to start with a choice to make the changes you need to make.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I am here with you. I will help you make those changes.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">-A.S.</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-75170909565072691312016-06-02T20:28:00.000-05:002016-06-02T20:28:49.295-05:00LAWS VS. TEACHINGS...FORCE VS. CHOICE<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgi2pW1MKIhMx6JJPtgY-hG5RKk_ASAllPih-bXxskY4tjUldqAU9rjNcyIOW9-qS7mCH_306O23kxafwjWJDbzFn4ZQsIAKTOChqrdvO4yBk6ir62rQSUPyDYBQsewuTGhhyt6j2_5rfc/s1600/barrel1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="195" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgi2pW1MKIhMx6JJPtgY-hG5RKk_ASAllPih-bXxskY4tjUldqAU9rjNcyIOW9-qS7mCH_306O23kxafwjWJDbzFn4ZQsIAKTOChqrdvO4yBk6ir62rQSUPyDYBQsewuTGhhyt6j2_5rfc/s320/barrel1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">The Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches that homosexual acts are "intrinsically disordered," contrary to natural law, and separate sexual acts from the gift of life. The same Catechism teaches that marriage is a covenant by which a man and woman are joined for life, for the good of the spouses, and the procreation of children.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">In short, the Catholic Church teaches that homosexuality and marriage are not compatible. But that's not what this blog is about.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The use of a constitutional amendment to legally define marriage as being between a man and woman was never a moral approach. <i>That's</i> what this is blog is about. Beyond those laws which prevent murder and theft, laws only serve to determine the number of people standing at the business end of a government-wielded gun. As any law can only be enforced by force, coercion, and confiscation--all of which are, in the case of same-sex unions, far more destructive than the acts they prevent--the Church (or any of its members) should not advocate the use of a voting booth to force others to live in compliance with Church teachings. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If the immorality of any type of government force is not reason enough to avoid writing laws in order to enforce one's faith, then the creation of division should be considered as well. Legally forcing outsiders to live by Church teachings (regardless of if done in defense of natural law or Church teachings themselves) creates a man-made divide between believers and unbelievers--and force and evangelism are, to put it lightly, at odds.</span><br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">A common reply to this usually goes something along the lines of, "but same-sex marriages separate sexual acts from the gift of life...natural law...and such." Well, yes, that's true--it's up there in the first paragraph. But the use of contraceptives does the exact same thing, and contraceptive use is pretty prevalent for something that is also contrary to Church teachings. Why not outlaw contraceptives, too?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The use of contraceptives within a marriage is no more private than any homosexual act within a marriage, no less rejecting of the gift of life, and the use of contraceptives is just as much of a choice as is participation in a homosexual act. Yet homosexual marriage is treated as a voting booth topic, and contraceptives are rarely even spoken of at Mass. Both equally separate sexual acts from the gift of life, and both should be addressed in the same way--by attempting to win the hearts and minds of believers and non-believers alike by explaining why the Church teaches what it does, and then allowing all individuals to live their lives with the free will to choose God's way or reject it. God gave man free will because he wants people to choose to have a relationship with Him--and the difference between choosing God's way and being forced to live God's way is the difference between marriage and slavery.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">There do exist issues which are more destructive than the authoritarian methods of a government-enforced law, but this is not one of them. Demanding that an issue like same-sex marriage be handled by a politician or judge doesn't change the group being restricted; it only adds to the number of people who were already controlled in the first place. At some point, there will be no one outside of that group to speak up for those who no longer are allowed a voice.</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-21865268008661188602016-06-02T00:58:00.000-05:002016-06-02T00:58:24.703-05:00HOME<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcAyh9HlI4eoNllV8kswGbuoQREsSKCHqAIivI9PzlGnd6zHQvbIjoUjztLDdrsYEsek60UvkDdd6MMbZ5i_NEYamXN0MidWZfXyt6_M8R6vuwem0ZBfR-MwkFEMttJhXMC8LW2SVPrLs/s1600/20160504_080109%255B1%255D.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcAyh9HlI4eoNllV8kswGbuoQREsSKCHqAIivI9PzlGnd6zHQvbIjoUjztLDdrsYEsek60UvkDdd6MMbZ5i_NEYamXN0MidWZfXyt6_M8R6vuwem0ZBfR-MwkFEMttJhXMC8LW2SVPrLs/s640/20160504_080109%255B1%255D.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I have never known such innocence. As I
watch your dark eyes change to blue, I can't help but ask what I can
do to help you to stay just as you are. When the days are dark and
the nights are cold, what can I do so that you can't breathe without
knowing the love that I have for you?</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All of your toys are simple, and
everything I touch is complicated. Every time I try to simplify and
cut things out, I only seem to find a more complicated way. What I
would give if I could help you to see the precious few things which
matter through the overwhelming number of things that don't. That
you could see what would matter to you ten years from now, and allow
that to help you ignore all of the noise that you hear today.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I would sing this to you, if it
had a tune. There will always be a place you can go when this world
wants to wash away everything that makes you sweet, your innocence
feels like it holds you back, and you are rejected for living the
principles that everyone else is content to merely talk about.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do you know where you can go?</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Long after the day comes when I can no
longer carry you away from your tears, this home will still be yours.
When your confidence is gone and you can't see anything beyond the
floor, this home will be your new start. It will be here to remind you of
why you are sweet and let you see the priceless value of your
innocence. If you are rich in nothing but soul, you will be rich when
you are here.</span></div>
Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-7665236947957359612016-03-29T14:56:00.000-05:002016-03-29T15:19:04.936-05:00CITY OF NORFOLK, NE: "LET'S PLANT 150 TREES [ON S. 7TH STREET]" <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The City of Norfolk, Nebraska is <a href="http://www.norfolkne150.com/"><span style="color: blue;">celebrating its 150th anniversary</span></a> in 2016. The City of Norfolk Tree Advisory Board has set a goal of having Norfolk residents plant 150 trees in honor of the anniversary. The following information is under the <a href="http://www.ci.norfolk.ne.us/parks/Tree_Advisory_Board.htm"><span style="color: blue;">Tree Advisory Board's section</span></a> of the city's website, anyway:</span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><i>Be a Norfolk Tree Bud!</i></span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Trees provide beauty, shade, windbreak and wildlife habitat in our community. Be a Tree Bud and help support trees in the Norfolk area.</span> </i></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><i>There are many ways you can be a Norfolk Tree Bud. One way is to contribute $2 on your water bill to <b>purchase, plant and care for trees</b> in Norfolk. Just check the box on your water bill that says "Sign up to add $2 charge to each water bill for trees." Or signup online!</i></span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><i>You can also plant a tree. For guidance on what trees are best to plant in the Norfolk area see our Tree Considerations list.</i></span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><i>It's the 150th anniversary of Norfolk so plant a tree, take a picture of you and/or your group that's planting the tree and send it to dbecker@ci.norfolk.ne.us and we'll post it on Facebook at www.facebook.com/norfolkne and we'll put it on our website at www.ci.norfolk.ne.us/parks/150trees.htm.</i></span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Say no more, Tree Advisers. I know exactly where to stick every one of the trees purchased through the water bill system. If the City of Norfolk and its Tree Advisory Board are serious about increasing beauty in the city, it would be most effective to plant the trees in (1) a publicly visible location (2) where the trees would not only replace an eyesore, but also (3) passively prevent people from trespassing by turning private property into a creeping expansion of the city's ugliest parking lot.</span><br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The area is already owned by the city--according to the Madison County assessor's office, the city owns the approximately 9' wide strip of land next to the curb--and it could definitely hold a lot of trees. </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The location is the east side of South 7th Street, between Madison Avenue and Omaha Avenue.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgznTqo3VmZSUgotqRd0vyd_BlKFx9Oc1dmRnrLzkkmafJ_AsNMQDrhSDS2qhUM05G1UweL9509W4BH74F5ZO4WEvwUrJsZnx9I-Gp6enxVFVmx5u2Z0lvxibG42iUye_wjdQXcwd0rciI/s1600/20160314_131239.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgznTqo3VmZSUgotqRd0vyd_BlKFx9Oc1dmRnrLzkkmafJ_AsNMQDrhSDS2qhUM05G1UweL9509W4BH74F5ZO4WEvwUrJsZnx9I-Gp6enxVFVmx5u2Z0lvxibG42iUye_wjdQXcwd0rciI/s640/20160314_131239.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The best part of this idea? Well, there are several best parts. First, the City of Norfolk does not have to </span><strike style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">steal</strike><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span><strike style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">claim</strike><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span><strike style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">sell a building to the the YMCA for $1 because IT'S FOR THE KIDS</strike><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> use privately owned land in order to make a serious improvement in the beauty of an area. The improvement would also make it easier for the owner of the private property to maintain their area, as they would not have to mow around the cars, trailers, propane tanks, and various other stored items that litter the east side of S. 7th St. south of Pasewalk Ave. And then there's the Norfolk Chamber of Commerce--seeing as how Chamber members are always prattling on about the greatness of Norfolk (<a href="http://analogschemes.blogspot.com/2013/12/i-welcome-myself-to-your-city-form.html"><span style="color: blue;">before leaving for places that have mountains</span></a>), surely its members would pull out all of the stops to beautify one of the two streets that lead directly to the Chamber building.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">There you have it, City of Norfolk Tree Advisory Board. Take every tree that is purchased through the water bill payment system, dig some holes along the east side of South 7th Street (with the distance between the holes being, say, slightly less than the width of a car), and help make a littered area of Norfolk look and stay beautiful!</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-8417191996424318262016-02-24T22:00:00.002-06:002016-02-24T22:45:29.273-06:00THE 18 STEPS THAT BROUGHT ME HOME<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYeVbuNE1SlahGRE1mgN48X9NvNiwT6HV5UMpnZAl25qWuA6aS8EHe5lIS5dtXNNADcuLq_cFabI3EXwrLXwEVB5bzfusieP3HpaZdRD7KVuYEbpGYrxHJ-D_2UMQMEn5hc-p893H67cw/s1600/house+front+transformation.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="236" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYeVbuNE1SlahGRE1mgN48X9NvNiwT6HV5UMpnZAl25qWuA6aS8EHe5lIS5dtXNNADcuLq_cFabI3EXwrLXwEVB5bzfusieP3HpaZdRD7KVuYEbpGYrxHJ-D_2UMQMEn5hc-p893H67cw/s640/house+front+transformation.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">EMPTY</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When there wasn't a small enough box to hold everything that I would bring into my marriage.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">UNPREPARED</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When, after having spent my first post-college year working a retail job, I moved to Norfolk because my future wife had a job there. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">SMALL</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I saw in myself none of the things that I believed a husband should have: money, a successful career, or at least the prospect of having one or the other. A husband, above all, should provide for his family.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">AIMLESS</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I saw endless reminders that I couldn't aim to be successful when I didn't even know where my target was.</span><br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">AGGRAVATED</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I took aim at every inch of an infinite horizon, but knew nothing would come of taking a shot.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">BROODING</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When given an abundance of time, doubt, and a fear-driven desire for success, I did what I had spent years doing: I turned inward. No one else would care as much as I did, and no one else had my perspective.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">LONELY</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I retreated into my head, I was on my own. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">COMFORTABLE</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I was on my own, at least I knew I was in good hands.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">LOST</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I wasn't sure of my location on my own map, my map had no destinations, and my map had no roads. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">RESOLUTE</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I made peace with not being able to find a target, I realized that I could build a target right where I was.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">DILIGENT</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When, rather than focusing on money, I started to list the things that families purchase when they have it.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">AMAZED</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I saw past the shiny cars, fishing boats, perfect-looking families, and luxurious vacation photos on Facebook. Not everyone had those things, but everyone needs a place to live.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">REFINED</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I saw that of those who had a place to live, not many seemed to feel at home.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">INSPIRED</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I saw that money could buy any house, but only people can make it a home.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">EXCITED</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When it became clear that it wouldn't take much house to make a great home.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">MOVED</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I realized that houses existed in my price range.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">COURAGEOUS</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I believed in my skills enough to purchase the house that would allow me to provide for my future family.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">VALIDATED</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When, after years of work, that house became our home.</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-56186041291808687912016-01-06T16:57:00.002-06:002016-01-06T17:04:11.992-06:00BLAME THE WEATHER!<div class="tr_bq">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrvkGz23KlgJmrTkIlkiQVD6BGeaeAYL7Md4kTy1ao-gglufndLvBXoOG2bnSITbirpJgH0Pp3Aiqc3iszpDP5nOlz7iSX6Z-TYk23a6FNpkPG3w_Iry9QCkqLqclZ5J3Sr9r2YDpgTAQ/s1600/IMG_6729.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrvkGz23KlgJmrTkIlkiQVD6BGeaeAYL7Md4kTy1ao-gglufndLvBXoOG2bnSITbirpJgH0Pp3Aiqc3iszpDP5nOlz7iSX6Z-TYk23a6FNpkPG3w_Iry9QCkqLqclZ5J3Sr9r2YDpgTAQ/s400/IMG_6729.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In 2014, Macy's stores blamed cold weather for poor sales.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2/25/2014: Sales and earnings full year 2013, ended Feb. 1, 2014</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i><b>In part, poor January sales were due to the unusually harsh winter weather across much of the country.</b> At one time or another during January, 244 Macy's and Bloomingdale's stores were closed because of weather, and the business remained sluggish until Valentine's Day,” he said. “Once warm spring weather arrives and our full assortment of fresh spring merchandise is in place, we believe customers will return to a more normalized pattern of shopping.</i></span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Fast forward to 2016. Sales not so good. Weather too warm!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">1/6/2016: Macy’s, Inc. Reports Nov/Dec Sales and Updates 2015 Guidance</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>The holiday selling season was challenging, as experienced throughout 2015 by much of the retailing industry. <b>In the November/December period, we were particularly disadvantaged by the historically warm weather in northern climate zones where both Macy’s and Bloomingdale’s are especially well-represented.</b> About 80 percent of our company’s year-over-year declines in comparable sales can be attributed to shortfalls in cold-weather goods such as coats, sweaters, boots, hats, gloves and scarves.</i></span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Weather is hard. Or maybe this is what happens when a business closes stores, buys back stock, and runs a bunch of commercials about how great its products and service are while its product and service levels decline.</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-64409328657672937182016-01-05T19:46:00.000-06:002016-01-05T21:29:09.159-06:00AMMON BUNDY: "YOU NEED TO DRAW YOUR OWN CONCLUSIONS"<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Done.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Ammon Bundy has created a country & western version of the Occupy movement: he has assembled an angry but inarticulate group of people, with government replacing Wall Street and gun rights have taken the place of marijuana legalization. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The group's grievances are far too micro to be driven by principle. They have taken over a wildlife refuge in response to the prison sentences handed out to Dwight and Steven Hammond, two ranchers who lit fires which spread to federal land. There are apparently other references to the "unwinding" of federal ownership of lands, but nothing specific enough to suspect principled motives.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The biggest problem, however, is that Bundy's group is outwardly fighting for the same things that any pro-liberty individual would seek to promote: fighting government corruption, abuse of power, and monopoly of force. What is the problem? While their motives may appear to be liberty-oriented, the group Bundy has assembled is very much not pro-liberty. Liberty is peaceful, and Bundy is looking for a fight. Unlike his father, Cliven Bundy, who was defended against federal agents by armed activists who came to his aid, the younger Bundy has assembled an armed group and is asking federal agents to come to him.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Liberty is not hard to understand; the principles of those who seek to promote liberty are understood by toddlers around the world: treat others as you want to be treated. Second to this is the non- or zero-aggression principle, which simply states that it is wrong to initiate force or steal something that doesn't belong to you.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Ammon Bundy is leading a group which has clearly initiated force. The government may have a monopoly on legal use of force, but that doesn't make Bundy's actions right--two wrongs don't do that. And Bundy has taken over an area that clearly does not belong to him--Woody Guthrie may have told us that "this land is my land, this land is your land," but the armed guards who locked down federal lands during the last government shutdown should tell you all you need to know about who believes they own those lands. </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All of this adds up to an extremely ill-conceived plan to fight federal corruption and overreach. The only thing that </span>Ammon<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span>Bundy<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> and his group of armed misfits will do is force the hand of those who seek to promote liberty rather than forcing the hand of a corrupt government--which is the exact opposite of what should be happening.</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-35615363217883087092015-12-06T22:08:00.000-06:002015-12-07T08:54:57.187-06:00THE COINCIDENCE OF SAN BERNADINO AND SYRIA<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNgksr0Mp7erx4j8XLJ6JPcVRgiaKjhKedPdZT1ByYlIw3OWzhy8klOIM8Me2xC7fXyT3gOjhkF7VnzLIss-7LLZmv6S_YVUn31AjDr1Ub38ZbqouQM1ySTKyCai-jvTA4Wd8OxN1sht4/s1600/San+Bernardino+Sacramento+Bee.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="206" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNgksr0Mp7erx4j8XLJ6JPcVRgiaKjhKedPdZT1ByYlIw3OWzhy8klOIM8Me2xC7fXyT3gOjhkF7VnzLIss-7LLZmv6S_YVUn31AjDr1Ub38ZbqouQM1ySTKyCai-jvTA4Wd8OxN1sht4/s400/San+Bernardino+Sacramento+Bee.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: right;">Photo credit: The Sacramento Bee</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Another week, another mass shooting. San </span>Bernadino<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> merits an Oval Office Address. And yet even the President of the United States can't talk about a shooting in the U.S. without acknowledging that there is a connection between domestic violence and military intervention in a foreign country.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">In dealing with ISIS, the President suggests that Americans are "wondering if we are confronting a cancer which as no immediate cure." Doubt has a way of creeping in when today's high-tech military is presented as the solution for problems caused by yesterday's high-tech military, which was supposed to solve the problems created by previous military intervention. If the desire is to stop ISIS, the one action which hasn't been tried in the lifetime of anyone born since 2001 should be given a chance: non-intervention. ISIS is just the latest example of the type of groups who fill the void when you displace the peaceful population of a country.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">No one at the Departments of State and Homeland Security will be fired. No agencies will be shut down. Instead, the budgets of anti-terrorism departments will grow. The centralization of power which has failed to prevent terrible acts--whether they are labeled as mass shootings or terrorism--will take more power from future victims and put it in the hands of fewer unaccountable people. We will be told that the tasks of stopping mass-shootings and overcoming ISIS will be complicated and difficult. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And yet, the situations which led to the mass shooting in San Bernadino and the "war" with ISIS in Syria are quite similar. The connection is based on a very simple-but-true concept: l</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">aw-abiding citizens have a vested interest in surrounding themselves with other law-abiding citizens.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And the remedies are far easier and cheaper than anything which has been tried to date. </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When law-abiding citizens are given the power to defend themselves, and when </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">sovereign countries are allowed to function free of outside forces, t</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">he effect is similar to that which grass can have on weeds in a healthy lawn--the desired grass is given an environment in which it can grow until there is no room for the weeds. It is not by violence or great power that the grass overwhelms the weeds--it is a simple matter of the grass growing and increasing in population until there is room for nothing else.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When the actions of foreign intervention turn the law-abiding citizens of a country into refugees, it should not come as a surprise when groups like ISIS take the place of law-abiding citizens. When the power to defend is taken from law-abiding citizens and given to fewer and fewer select individuals, it should not come as a surprise when the law-abiding citizens find themselves as victims.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">This isn't hard to understand. Free markets work in many directions--in a healthy environment, good people prosper. In a violent and manipulated environment, the violent and manipulative prosper. Again, grass does not prosper due to violence, but because its very growth naturally prevents weeds from overtaking it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">This is the link between San Bernadino and Syria--the power to influence their own fate was taken from the victims and refugees, and the few who were given the power to protect the victims and refugees failed to do so. When all people have the power to prevent their demise, their actions need not be powerful or violent in order to have great effect. But when the power is taken from the people, it is only with great violence that peace can be achieved. And however long that peace may last, the responding force is always too late to be of any benefit to the initial victims.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If you want to prevent people from becoming victims, they must be allowed to defend themselves.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And when you want to prevent people from becoming refugees, you must acknowledge the sovereignty of their decisions and not destroy the infrastructure of their country through military intervention.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Yet what is the United States' "principled" response to the situations in San Bernadino and Syria?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Where there are victims in the United States, politicians propose restrictions on gun ownership.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And in Syria, U.S. politicians will provide guns (and training) to "moderates" who will fight against those the U.S. wishes to displace.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Who could ever see this going badly? As in--worse than it is today?</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-18973905946518559472015-12-04T17:51:00.000-06:002015-12-05T09:15:24.560-06:00SMALL SPACE, BIG STYLE: THE ANTITHESIS OF HGTV, ON HGTV<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkru6tIg9djaj2oTm_GX-gk_fJU28ovldfTdbokz8iekJ-zio3mbRoX3F2FFx9y8wmmUbeR8LZG_8sMS4k1LhVF5iYRsQazSb7VDMjur5j2mpV0Z8kKUD-C2wV956AiZMRdNOFxs37-7A/s1600/HGTV+Small+Space+Big+Style+kitchen.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkru6tIg9djaj2oTm_GX-gk_fJU28ovldfTdbokz8iekJ-zio3mbRoX3F2FFx9y8wmmUbeR8LZG_8sMS4k1LhVF5iYRsQazSb7VDMjur5j2mpV0Z8kKUD-C2wV956AiZMRdNOFxs37-7A/s320/HGTV+Small+Space+Big+Style+kitchen.jpeg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: right;">Photo credit: HGTV.com</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><i>Last week I came across this piece of paper. I had drawn my ideal home--this is when I was in high school--and I had a nook for a piano, and a library, and a dance area and music. And it was funny, because I was realizing that was what I've created here--and I'm very, very happy.</i></span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">-Callie Kimball, Small Space, Big Style (Season 1, Episode 8)</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">HGTV is a network whose shows focus </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">almost exclusively</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">on lost souls who believe they will find happiness in granite </span>countertops<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">, vaulted ceilings, stainless appliances, hardwood floors, open concepts, brushed bar pull hardware, custom cabinets, gas stoves with red knobs, man caves, theater rooms, gigantic yards, dramatic entrances--basically, anything that looks shiny.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The show which forces the "almost exclusively" into that entirely accurate description of HGTV? A seemingly little-known show called Small Space, Big Style (SSBS). On its face, viewings by visitors of the 408 have missed the saving graces of SSBS in absolutely breathtaking ways--focusing instead on how "HGTV just forces the gay issue," "you don't really need a dishwasher," and "they'll just want a bigger space in a few months anyway," the ambient feedback has illustrated that sometimes even the best of things need to be spelled out. Like this. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So here it is. Aside from SSBS, the message of every show on HGTV is that happiness is only found in that which you do not yet possess, that only money can make a house a home, and that you are entitled to be an asshole about what you want as long as you've conned a bank into loaning you the money that you claim is your own. The dressing on that message varies from one show to another, but the message is essentially the same.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">SSBS, however, is the antithesis of that message. The homeowners on SSBS love their homes. They have maximized their spaces. A few of them may be free spirits, hippies, overly-focused artists, or any number of other oddballs, but they are happy with what they have.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Read that again: SSBS shows homeowners who are happy with what they have. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Not people who are searching for happiness.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">People who are happy now. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">This is on HGTV.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If that isn't enough of a punch in the gut to dislodge at least a little bit of cynicism, that's just too bad. Because SSBS is story after story after story about individuals who took a tiny piece of land, or a house that no one else wanted, or a space that simply stirred some part of their imagination into action, and made every square foot of their property into a place where they want to live. It isn't that the homeowners on SSBS don't want all of the finer things shown on other HGTV shows, but rather that they have chosen to be happy without them. And while some of the spaces (and individuals) may be impractical, almost every story is inspiring in ways that no other show on HGTV--or any channel, for that matter--is.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">SSBS is a show for people who don't believe that peace and happiness are things which can only be found over some distant horizon, but rather that those things are only found by people who choose to find them in the present. Above all, it's a show for and about people who have decided to succeed on their own terms. Who doesn't want to look around their home and say to themselves, "I love living here!"? SSBS is a show that inspires you to do whatever it takes to do just that.</span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-91936098998656530412015-11-03T20:15:00.000-06:002015-11-03T20:31:35.269-06:00I'M HERE TO HELP!<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">My name is Timmy. I will help prepare you for a baby.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMbyM6uhVoxfVnhKyHPXakgqR6i-9exoTffd8XT1uTjzzu1Lps6kN7ygQSCczyIVOg5pP3S5y8N0ZOTj_QLaSUGcdZhsqyI6ivbJfL7VsgfkEYo5xJCaHcp8YFNBHANYiT1YrJEd2DPi4/s1600/Timmy_altered.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMbyM6uhVoxfVnhKyHPXakgqR6i-9exoTffd8XT1uTjzzu1Lps6kN7ygQSCczyIVOg5pP3S5y8N0ZOTj_QLaSUGcdZhsqyI6ivbJfL7VsgfkEYo5xJCaHcp8YFNBHANYiT1YrJEd2DPi4/s320/Timmy_altered.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I will help you remember which things aren't kid friendly.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_Dfg324wFGipqXxrig9uVLeRj4EkVk1qhyphenhyphen0erRpHQTZJHi27rXOfogWeish_P_sjPA-VC4faH79WH9GTW1HBqiBLI9ZIVxnxsc8dkRUbXMnNQ1_a6e8yj2mLkDdMIJ-3i1cVIr6-YQdQ/s1600/Timmy+bullets.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_Dfg324wFGipqXxrig9uVLeRj4EkVk1qhyphenhyphen0erRpHQTZJHi27rXOfogWeish_P_sjPA-VC4faH79WH9GTW1HBqiBLI9ZIVxnxsc8dkRUbXMnNQ1_a6e8yj2mLkDdMIJ-3i1cVIr6-YQdQ/s320/Timmy+bullets.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I will vocally demand breakfast. And dinner. And dessert.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And I will vocally demand that you open all doors, even when I don't want to want to go through them. I just have an aimless problem with closed doors.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I will find things that you don't want me to find.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiR68Ylmvr8ylxdzwj0pF6fNyAAgk8TAqs_aVbISyZzZBeL1L2DW26SnzSRYhCtfqP4e1csCyz3vCe89rcgnMUZt-7Ze85zqAyifOSzzj-_g8l5qqf6Tlkr-MWQI34exN8KC5l43EcgQIA/s1600/20140505_210106.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiR68Ylmvr8ylxdzwj0pF6fNyAAgk8TAqs_aVbISyZzZBeL1L2DW26SnzSRYhCtfqP4e1csCyz3vCe89rcgnMUZt-7Ze85zqAyifOSzzj-_g8l5qqf6Tlkr-MWQI34exN8KC5l43EcgQIA/s320/20140505_210106.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I will get into things you don't want me to get into.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsaJMOE6GqaVlLxPId81r2xfk30SjNlToXJzC1lkm_MYQTuZM6y5vUvAZPFjeeBM9nsCnIGYK5MsLxsS0pvgJgGxO-b7YZEaEh3cKEjHcq2KsY3OMdCp-00MgIz7pjSBSddLD3zppLpVk/s1600/Timmy_Cat_Toilet.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="237" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsaJMOE6GqaVlLxPId81r2xfk30SjNlToXJzC1lkm_MYQTuZM6y5vUvAZPFjeeBM9nsCnIGYK5MsLxsS0pvgJgGxO-b7YZEaEh3cKEjHcq2KsY3OMdCp-00MgIz7pjSBSddLD3zppLpVk/s320/Timmy_Cat_Toilet.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I will open things you don't want me to open.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQQ24y6FgHTuA287UmI8Uk8EofcMFpGgqIU7UJF4H-WqVH9y2zpjS5WJ4F_6i88j422wajSRYJqVe4FiJc83PRc2VKE6QUpOQqlWUHC2uT-XJ8We7KOW6_1tEzV0R_q5rzZsw_99Ty4u0/s1600/Timmy_doorknob.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQQ24y6FgHTuA287UmI8Uk8EofcMFpGgqIU7UJF4H-WqVH9y2zpjS5WJ4F_6i88j422wajSRYJqVe4FiJc83PRc2VKE6QUpOQqlWUHC2uT-XJ8We7KOW6_1tEzV0R_q5rzZsw_99Ty4u0/s320/Timmy_doorknob.jpg" width="226" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And I will ignore the places where you want me to stay.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxJl-xbWkMAjELM0pkeHLhwsyBBWopHvl41RjY3kFFxd8lwL2eBCKIZ4c2NFiEQO1kSUyzQDhZlQELJBhx6M5N2W2PAAiksVheBHsUCKzZMhSyuoBY0B_T5YCHuJ2glciClA3WYeBN5k0/s1600/Cat_ignore_bed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxJl-xbWkMAjELM0pkeHLhwsyBBWopHvl41RjY3kFFxd8lwL2eBCKIZ4c2NFiEQO1kSUyzQDhZlQELJBhx6M5N2W2PAAiksVheBHsUCKzZMhSyuoBY0B_T5YCHuJ2glciClA3WYeBN5k0/s320/Cat_ignore_bed.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I will eat the plastic pine needles on your fake Christmas tree, and this will cause me to leave the litter box while things are still dangling. And those things will fall on the floor.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">(Seriously, no one takes photos of processed tree litter sitting next to the litter box.)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And when I get a cut on my leg? You can take me to get stitches. And I will lick them out.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So you can take me back for staples and a cone of shame.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCkooGTUar-GfSOvEnUFZoTUdGQzlqvhcDGO_agQa0UDkTbvT0EpgV1-LOPPq6QKOqN099HJWvDQSNtVfTWejOTchaEhJYMc62OmL7LY6GbjWyA6EZsJDyxmcd142syCSQi7KNIP-4Fiw/s1600/Cat_cone_shame.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="230" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCkooGTUar-GfSOvEnUFZoTUdGQzlqvhcDGO_agQa0UDkTbvT0EpgV1-LOPPq6QKOqN099HJWvDQSNtVfTWejOTchaEhJYMc62OmL7LY6GbjWyA6EZsJDyxmcd142syCSQi7KNIP-4Fiw/s320/Cat_cone_shame.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And then I will still manage to contort my body so that I can reach around the cone to pull the staples out.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And you will have to do this...</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7sivlBGrstd0R1C4DgVYjU28cmhtFXLf4JGoYxLkDFOYlojNS9_qIRA0XDeZz2FZhvDAP0v6oA-KvYNz-qObPuytewTuOa3WutylkMhQgXHEwtaC0A9SQJWhhKcBA4UklyShKKUppfAQ/s1600/Cat_onesie_of_shame.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7sivlBGrstd0R1C4DgVYjU28cmhtFXLf4JGoYxLkDFOYlojNS9_qIRA0XDeZz2FZhvDAP0v6oA-KvYNz-qObPuytewTuOa3WutylkMhQgXHEwtaC0A9SQJWhhKcBA4UklyShKKUppfAQ/s320/Cat_onesie_of_shame.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">...and this...</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_JPeDBFIsWIKU6jkxFXIrRAitIsOXhZVv0a8AFJMG8sn0LOZB_Byo6DEMlg9s3yQabX_HijJBwCQZ-QLnDeAkW5c9cWa_PbrirllfBFhydnl5apocRm1pNTPEuL9SItG1e9bf_5jPBmA/s1600/Cat_onesie_more_shame.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_JPeDBFIsWIKU6jkxFXIrRAitIsOXhZVv0a8AFJMG8sn0LOZB_Byo6DEMlg9s3yQabX_HijJBwCQZ-QLnDeAkW5c9cWa_PbrirllfBFhydnl5apocRm1pNTPEuL9SItG1e9bf_5jPBmA/s320/Cat_onesie_more_shame.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">...and this...</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgucnozSYSIS2r7BQP0_WPunR35EMWoZupoJbeOai_G1j9oeJaueRf6yHAbS5iGKpyo-T8mqATtXdleg9Ygiw8zd6JaplqGQE98np8wC9LeBx99F9xF5jye8CkK9RJ7y9F454DBbWxx3K4/s1600/Cat_onesie_maximum_shame.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgucnozSYSIS2r7BQP0_WPunR35EMWoZupoJbeOai_G1j9oeJaueRf6yHAbS5iGKpyo-T8mqATtXdleg9Ygiw8zd6JaplqGQE98np8wC9LeBx99F9xF5jye8CkK9RJ7y9F454DBbWxx3K4/s320/Cat_onesie_maximum_shame.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">...until you get this rigged up.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhI-9hkTqt6jKBgZWx6y1CRJlO7scpaMJMMB8HNcVz_e-q6OQy_nYdrvSVIB1mBeob-QGxJC3_HjtUYF8SBbsbjTixnP4jSUChg5jwNJLGWbxnXxF9Zbsf17w3wWBUkSdNuIVjHSHhSv_g/s1600/Cat_extended_cone_shame.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="208" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhI-9hkTqt6jKBgZWx6y1CRJlO7scpaMJMMB8HNcVz_e-q6OQy_nYdrvSVIB1mBeob-QGxJC3_HjtUYF8SBbsbjTixnP4jSUChg5jwNJLGWbxnXxF9Zbsf17w3wWBUkSdNuIVjHSHhSv_g/s320/Cat_extended_cone_shame.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And I will be more proud of knocking over the trash can than you are of everything you've ever accomplished.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbmq3hj-ZSl2FcaNTPzB0k0rEHQRKpuWcO1KweqF7PT_hwjqAeZ2a-E1gXuWNGu_eTVuV3lB642KpbVd3B4glu4tRoB9NHt2HIXObPxlofb8s-22E3cPrUH5V2A0aCqxMmUnbmVklN-pA/s1600/Cat_trash_can.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbmq3hj-ZSl2FcaNTPzB0k0rEHQRKpuWcO1KweqF7PT_hwjqAeZ2a-E1gXuWNGu_eTVuV3lB642KpbVd3B4glu4tRoB9NHt2HIXObPxlofb8s-22E3cPrUH5V2A0aCqxMmUnbmVklN-pA/s320/Cat_trash_can.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Basically, what I'm saying is that I will be the opposite of what most people think of when they think of cats. I will be high maintenance. Loud. Obnoxious. Clingy. Neurotic. Compulsive. And--unlike a kid--my learning curve will always fluctuate between flat and inverted.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So while it is true that you can't lock a baby in the mudroom with a pile of food and a giant bowl of water when you want to leave for the weekend, that is pretty much common knowledge. But I will also help you to understand what makes it so worthwhile--that even when I do something that makes you want to drown me, I will also be so sweet that you'll just want to jump out a second floor window.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgc634h0sBFm1gX-HGkdrfgX7bcsw1z1BSdSPB-cMNApXCFIkZG_kLOz_T3i7JAXygJKqNACcfWynL7yDs8ooRfVsYzsNnuH-01UNDqVJY9zPuuoHaYeIx7qwnxe3e6vd9kIP4TbQtxoUE/s1600/Sweet_moment.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgc634h0sBFm1gX-HGkdrfgX7bcsw1z1BSdSPB-cMNApXCFIkZG_kLOz_T3i7JAXygJKqNACcfWynL7yDs8ooRfVsYzsNnuH-01UNDqVJY9zPuuoHaYeIx7qwnxe3e6vd9kIP4TbQtxoUE/s320/Sweet_moment.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-19662804822356485442015-10-30T20:52:00.000-05:002015-11-01T12:44:36.646-06:00NOTHING PREPARES YOU FOR LIFE WITH BABY<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Babies are bottomless pits of sleepless work--that's the subliminal story told by many in the current generation of parents when their childless peers dare to even joke about how something in their life is preparing them for children. Eyes roll. Difficulty is laughed off. You must bow before the impossibility of having children because having children is harder than anything you've ever done in your little life. Your pre-children trials are filled with helium, skippy. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Replacing a radiator, for example, is nothing but work--but you aren't likely to be taken seriously if you decide to be dramatic about the task. Even if you replaced ten radiators in one day, you can bet money that you could find a parent somewhere who would shrug and tell you about how they once had an eleven-diaper day. And nothing is worse than eleven dirty diapers--oh, you don't know humility until you touch that much poop! What's that--you have to push your internal hemorrhoids back in every time you have to flush twice? Applying cream doesn't count when its on yourself. *quickly changes subject*</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A few of us have been listening. While years of charmingly condescending statements of how "nothing can prepare you" and "you won't understand until you have kids" have made it clear that some people 1) require the arrival of children in order to understand just how micro their world is, 2)</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> seem to think that their children are self-validating proof that your life will never be as hard as theirs, and 3) believe </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">there's a club, and you'll never be in it, the generally useless noise coming from the parent club has made me so ready for this baby that I may well punch the doctor right in the face as soon as the baby is out of his hands. I've been in a doctor-punching mood lately, anyway.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I am not going to sleep. I will put my family on my back and carry it until it can walk again. I will give and I will have no end.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I am ready. I am ready because I waited while everyone around me rushed in, found that they weren't ready, and decided that--because they weren't ready--<i>no one can be ready</i>! The things I'm told I won't continue to do after my kids arrive? Those who dispense such advice didn't do them <i>before</i> their kids arrived. Ohmygoodness, painting trim? You won't care about that when your kids are running around like bombs inside your house. You'll just laugh!</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXRUaoaIUNA6_Ah1XI5Mymb_2XaBk7bETpJmHybAmRA4ovQnn902413CbcXfuidXoCciYNOFgtSvzQ9S5rn1-eCzfPEDqU1aLS99qDSRbAHCuQtDdVO-U_-97aEj1mVv10CsV7WIYT2B0/s1600/baby+in+house.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXRUaoaIUNA6_Ah1XI5Mymb_2XaBk7bETpJmHybAmRA4ovQnn902413CbcXfuidXoCciYNOFgtSvzQ9S5rn1-eCzfPEDqU1aLS99qDSRbAHCuQtDdVO-U_-97aEj1mVv10CsV7WIYT2B0/s320/baby+in+house.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I may well laugh, but I'll do it with a paintbrush in my hand. Momma didn't raise a quitter, and I've got an example to set. </span>Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7214006183208073174.post-21876025206480461072015-10-05T13:47:00.000-05:002015-10-05T13:51:58.065-05:00APPARENTLY VIOLENCE REALLY IS THE ANSWER<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdKUL3uOEvXdjdeub3jWbh9NYkjg8kaDmBdWkDBtpVPJroUiX8L09qtbjH_qj_YYa0elI0wts4h-E1vtlk8525QuNwrggwd6MeCqt-ryuWdipm3swz-YfFH-Bv5UCkwyPcQ-s1QzwFUW4/s1600/kunduz-hospital.jpg_1718483346.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="361" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdKUL3uOEvXdjdeub3jWbh9NYkjg8kaDmBdWkDBtpVPJroUiX8L09qtbjH_qj_YYa0elI0wts4h-E1vtlk8525QuNwrggwd6MeCqt-ryuWdipm3swz-YfFH-Bv5UCkwyPcQ-s1QzwFUW4/s640/kunduz-hospital.jpg_1718483346.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">http://www.telesurtv.net/</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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Anyone born after 2001 has never known a time when America has not been at war. Every day that "we the people" allow our troops to be used as a solution, we tell ourselves that violence and killing is the answer. News of the US military's bombing of a hospital in Afghanistan comes only days after a mass-shooting in Oregon, and neither the military advocates nor the gun control advocates seem to be talking about the overlap between the two: violence, when used as a solution, resulted in equally dead people in both cases.<br />
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Violence in America should come as no surprise. Many Americans are nothing if not patriotic, and patriotism is 99% supporting the troops and 1% voting. Voting only changes the color of the party ordering the troops. And what do troops do? A few National Guard units may help out after natural disasters, but--with rare exception--hammers are almost exclusively used for hitting things. Troops kill, maintain things that kill, or support people who kill. And you, American, must support your troops. It's like an ice-bucket challenge that you aren't allowed to forget.<br />
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Country music is flooded with songs about how soldiers give their lives so that we can have our cold beer on Friday nights (hyperbole may help sell a few extra albums, even when it is taken seriously). Any time the NFL doesn't spend on psa's about breast cancer is spent promoting military veterans as heroes. NASCAR is no different. Violence and killing is held up as the solution, but no one calls it by that name. Most people probably don't even make the connection, and an entire generation will be raised on the message as a result. This explains why violence in America is followed by candle light vigils, while overseas destruction caused by American bombs is followed by a mixture of cheering from military advocates and silence from gun control advocates.<br />
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Those who live by the sword will die by the sword, even if they refuse to call a sword what it is. Until Americans come to understand that violence and killing represent total failure--regardless of whether the Pentagon or an angry young man is behind the violence--it should come as no surprise when violence continues to become more and more commonplace.Tom Richeyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13555411831033063987noreply@blogger.com